A Mother's Legacy

People say that age is just a number and that it is utterly irrelevant. While I see this as an indisputable truth, I cannot stop myself from thinking of something special to give to my Elaine. In three days time, she is turning 50. She's an independent woman who seems to have no need for people to look for her. She is special and I cannot fathom how I would have survived in this world without the things she has sacrificed for me.

I reached through my pocket before releasing an audible sigh. Will she love the gift I will be giving her? I was contemplating as I looked at the worn-out boots that I am wearing.

“How many years have you been working as a garbage collector?”

“It’s my twentieth year in this job. I am just happy that I will not die a garbage collector John.”

“Good for you! You are doing something noble man. I salute you for doing this.”

I drank the remaining beer and pondered on the remarks of my new partner. John is a young man and I really envy his dedication. Was I like him when I was young, I may have given my daughter and my mother a comfortable life. After the short stay in the pub, I decided to head home.

Along the alleys of this city, I get to feel the presence of Elaine. She is not a famous celebrity. She is not a renowned person. Few knew her. Few knew her story. It was this few people whom I can vouch will stand proud of the real Elaine de Grass.

It was one fateful night of December 1980. Elaine was on her way to the dorm when a group of four college students forced her to hop into their car. Unable to fight, Elaine submitted herself and was brought to the big blue house on the corner of 32^nd and 33^rd Avenue. She wanted to shout for help but her fear capsized her desire to flee. She was drugged up and was raped. The next morning she was found out lying naked near the central plaza. But rather than being cared as someone in distress and a victim, she was labeled a slut. Her parents died fighting for the justice that Elaine deserves. Sad to say, the money and connection of her captors overwhelmed the truth that lies behind that blue house.

Fifteen years forward, Elaine is a single mother. She struggled to work on three jobs to give her son a good life. In the morning, she would deliver harvests from farms in the southern plains to fresh shops in the city. After all these, she would proceed to her next stop. She’ll need to remain standing for 8 hours as a cashier in one of the stores she delivers vegetables. When the store closes, she will hurriedly go to reach the 5 pm log-in time to the restaurant where she works part time.

The young son she had was never appreciative of Elaine’s effort. He despised her mother for raising him alone. He has been rebellious for he felt that it was Elaine’s fault why he never saw or knew who his father was. He stopped schooling at the age of 14 and went to join a gang. It was typical for him and Elaine to just see each other in prison or police station. Elaine bails him out and he walks away. This is the life he has lived for 10 years until he finally settled with the woman who has changed him. This woman was really amazing but then fate is just a bitter thing. The day she gave birth to a girl, the woman died. Nevertheless, everything that has become of the rebellious boy is owed to this woman. It was this event that made the boy realized how much she has failed his own mother. He reopened his heart to the mother he has never considered to be one.

I can clearly recall how my tears were like never ending as Elaine tells me the truth behind my existence. Elaine, the ever naïve and selfless mother was mumbling as she narrates to me what happened that day. This encounter was exactly 10 years ago but I can still remember how the atmosphere of that day has struck a lightning into the very soul of mine. I was a failure as a son. I failed to treasure the very person who saw my existence as a gift more than a curse. It was that time when I realized that I owe Elaine more than what she has received from me.

Up to now, I still feel the intense sense of guilt and remorse when I see Elaine. I tried my best to make it up with her. Nevertheless, Deep in me lies this haunting of conscience that constantly reminds of how I deprived Elaine the chance to become a mother to a young boy. Being a parent, I know that I could never go beyond what Elaine has done to me. I just don’t know how I can show Elaine the gratitude that is in me. And now, she is turning 50. Alas! 50 years of existence in a world which tried her beyond what she could have taken. 50 years filled with sufferings she did not deserve. I know I have to find something that would make her smile, something that would make her happy. I cannot buy the years back but I can surely do things right now to make this woman know that she is special. 

I came to look at the odds and possibilities. I need to do it now. I have saved enough money for Elaine to start her bakeshop. Every since my younger years, I saw her as a very good baker. She has the flare to make bread delicious beyond taste and smell. I will throw her the best birthday surprise, a bakery of her own. Everything is set. I will be serving my last duty tomorrow as a garbage collector. The resignation which I handed a month ago will take effect and I will be able to get the separation pay which I could add up to finance the bakery.

The streets are filled with spirit of Christmas. The colorful displays of the stores and music somehow consoled my soul. I came to pass a jewelry store and saw something peculiar. There is this necklace which is somehow similar to what Elaine has when she was young. The necklace which I once stole and pawned during my younger years somehow reappeared in front of me. Was this coincidence or a work of fate, I do not know. I have decided to purchase this tomorrow and give it to her. She will surely look gorgeous with this necklace.

My last day at work came and everything went as planned. It was a day of joy and sadness. I am happy to start a new life and I am sad to bid farewell to people who have valued and treated me as a man of dignity. I went to the shop and bought the necklace. On the doorstep of our apartment, I felt something eerie and that feeling exemplified when I found out that nobody is inside. I found a note from my daughter telling that Elaine is hospitalized and that she is accompanying her. I hurriedly grab a cab and went to the hospital. The documents of the bakery and the necklace I wanted to give Elaine are still with me. I am still holding my gifts. I went inside the morgue to see her lifeless body. I was in a state of confusion. I took Elaine to my arms and cried. I once again failed Elaine. I just don’t know. I think it was always meant like this. Maybe, I am really a curse to her and I should have never existed in the first place. It was a long period of grieving and I was just lucky that my daughter was there. She was the one who supported me. If not, I could have not known what to do next.

Two months after Elaine was buried, I am still feeling the pain. I am entering Elaine’s room for the first time after her passing. I was surprised as to how organized it is. Elaine died of cancer. She did not tell any of us but she was aware that she was to die that month. It was devastating. Elaine has remained to her character until the end, an independent woman who tries to do things on her own. I pulled one of the drawers and saw a letter addressed to me. Tears were rolling in my cheeks when I reached under her bed and open a box containing the pair of boots she bought me as Christmas gift. I took the necklace from my pocket and smiled. “Elaine, you will always be the best.” I said to myself. I carefully place the boots back and push the gift box back to where it was.

I just learned that the necklace I was about to give to her is actually the real necklace she once owned. She was actually able to recover it from the pawnshop before and kept it hidden for years. Two days before she died, she sold the necklace to the jewelry store to buy me and my daughter gifts. They are all under her bed… The truth behind Elaine, they all are found under her bed. I just did not mind checking them for I already know enough about this woman… Elaine was the mother I missed to have. Elaine was the mother every child would wish for. Elaine is just extraordinary.

I left the room and went to open the bakery. Now that I have more reasons to be happy, I feel rejuvenated. Everything is set inside so I flipped the sign which reads “Welcome to Elaine’s Bakeshop!”