Thought Catalog: Know your numbers

One of the key disciplines many Filipinos struggle with is managing their finances. Admittedly, I’ve been guilty of this since I was younger—and to some extent, I still am. I sometimes overspend on unnecessary things. I help without hesitation, even when it becomes an inconvenience for me.

In a collective culture like ours, it’s not uncommon for us to shoulder the burdens of others. Unlike in Western cultures, where the "I" often takes precedence over the "WE," Filipinos are known for prioritizing family, friends, and even strangers over personal gratification. After all, we’re sometimes dubbed the friendliest people in the world.

However, as I grew older, I became more aware of the consequences of this mindset. I realized it doesn’t always have to be that way. There are times when we must protect our own well-being so we can be better influences on those around us. This realization deepened through my frequent travels over the past few years. Meeting people from all walks of life and different cultures exposed me to diverse perspectives. Their views, opinions, and experiences made me understand that in a societal world, individualism is your shield against exploitation.

With these newfound values, I became more responsible in securing my finances. While helping others is noble, setting boundaries is crucial. One of the most effective ways to practice this is by knowing your numbers. No matter how much you earn, your pocket is not a bottomless abyss. And when tragedy strikes, your best safety net is yourself.

One secret to why I can travel multiple times a year is budgeting. I use planners and meticulously track my expenses. Over the past three or four years, this habit has helped me navigate an adventure-driven life. Moving forward, my focus is on securing my future. And once again, I see that by knowing my numbers, I can build a stable future without becoming a burden to anyone.

Hinumdumi nga ang kwarta naay tawo, mao nga angayan pud nga ang tawo naay kwarta. Kay ang kamatuoran, kung wa tay kwarta, ang tan-aw sa lain nato kay dili tawo.

Mao ra to, skl.

p.s. dili pa ko tawo karon kay wa pa koy kwarta. 😂😂

 

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Thought Catalog: Your reaction is valid but is it correct?

In my last drinking session with friends, we tackled how one should react to insults and bad situations. A lot of course of actions were opined and I just said to them that they are valid responses, but they need to consider if what they will be doing is correct.

In philosophy, particularly in ethics and moral reasoning, a reaction to a bad situation can be considered valid but not correct if it is understandable or justifiable based on human emotions or reasoning, yet it does not align with ethical principles or the most appropriate course of action. This distinction is important to consider because it highlights the difference between what feels right in the moment and what is ethically right in the broader context of moral principles and long-term consequences.

A reaction might be valid if it is a natural human response. For example, feeling anger or sadness in response to a betrayal is valid because it aligns with typical emotional reactions. These emotions are part of the human experience and are often immediate and instinctive. Similarly, a reaction may be valid if it can be justified by the context or circumstances. For instance, reacting defensively in a threatening situation is valid because self-preservation is a natural instinct. Such reactions are grounded in the basic human need for safety and survival.

However, a reaction is not necessarily correct if it violates ethical principles such as justice, fairness, or compassion. Responding to hurt with revenge might be emotionally valid but is not ethically correct. Ethical correctness requires a higher level of reflection and consideration of moral principles that guide us toward more just and compassionate responses. Additionally, a reaction might not be correct if it leads to negative long-term consequences for oneself or others. Making a rash decision out of anger might be valid in the moment but harmful in the long run, as it can cause further harm and perpetuate a cycle of negative reactions.

Ultimately, the difference between a valid and correct reaction lies in the alignment with ethical standards and rational analysis. While a reaction that feels right emotionally might be valid, it may not hold up under thoughtful consideration of all factors and potential outcomes. Ethical decision-making involves looking beyond immediate feelings and reactions to consider the broader impact of our actions, striving for responses that uphold principles of justice, fairness, and compassion. In this way, we can ensure that our reactions, while valid, also align with what is ethically correct.

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28 years of life and still...

The 4 Non Blondes’ song What’s Up is a perfect lyrical metaphor of the story of each of our lives. We are always trying to figure out a destination. Whether it is the search for a concrete career path, a life-long partner, a sense of purpose, each one of us is in a continuing battle of figuring out what comes next in our lives. Some of us have definite plans while others tend to be very lax in putting weight on what comes after today. The truth is neither of these two is better than the other. 

Those who live for today and those who try to give up today for a better tomorrow are on equal footing as neither one is superior to the other. You may disagree with me on this, but let us just agree to disagree. I am in no position to lecture you on what is right and what is wrong because the truth is that there is no definite right and no definite wrong. Right and wrong are social constructs that we have imposed as a species to be able to uphold the very fabric that keeps our society. We have a catch-all term for this, morality. The truth is that morality was, is, and will never be absolute and resolute. There will come a time when what is right today will become unacceptable. That is how things have been and that will be how things shall continue to be. 

Climbing the great big hill…

Where do you stand on the hill that you call ambition? Have you reached the apex? Or, are you still figuring out how to get there? Chill… You will have your equal share of doubts – of questions as to whether you are doing the right things.  Again, do whatever you want to do. Because at the end of the day, it’s your life and no matter how much others will fiddle and get involved in it, you are the final arbiter and the final say will come from you. Just do what your heart tells you to do. Do not be afraid of judgment but don’t be cynical about other people’s opinions. These are born for reasons that are equally acceptable as the essentiality of your own belief. Just don’t let them dictate the story of your life.

The world is made up of brotherhood…

I always have this question in mind – would I be able to live without connecting to people? I tried. This year, I went to five countries alone with as little connection as possible. It was the best thing that I ever did, but it gave me this harsh truth that no matter how much you want to be alone, you will and will need people. The truth is that we only see connections that are essential to our lives without thinking that we are connected to a lot of people. The pilot that brought you from your point of origin to your destination was there not just for the job but also for the fact that there are people who rely on him including you. The small food stall owner who cooked that delicious laksa that you love was not just there for profit but also because she knows that people will need to eat good food. You see, this world is made up of brotherhoods of different sizes. You can never be alone and you will never be. As much as you hate people, you cannot stand on your own without the toil of others. 

I cry sometimes just to get it all out…

Like a glass filled to the brim, you will soon start spilling over. Our emotions can sometimes outsmart us. When these times happen, remember that it is perfectly normal. Get angry; shout the most demeaning expletives you can think of; say as many “fuck you” as you want, just let it all out. The more you hide your emotions, the more dangerous they become. Just spill it over. Be as mean as you can go as that is the best way to outgrow such emotions – for you to become better at handling them. Again, let it all out.

I’m feeling a little peculiar…

Be unique! And by that, I mean that you must be true to yourself. Don’t cripple your wings because society dictates that you have to be this way. Remember that the best reflection of yourself is observed by no other person but you. Remember that you don’t have to fit in some other person’s shoes. Remember that whatever you want to become, you are capable of doing so. The only limit that you have is the one that you set on yourself. Go further than what you ever want. Be your own motivation.

I wake in the morning and I step outside…

Consider each day as a gift. The more you put a value on what is happening today, the more you become focused on achieving something that will not just influence you right now but will also shape your future. Don’t be afraid to go beyond your norms. Keep that fire of desire burning within you. There is no such thing as a dead-end failure. Only that some people give up after a few tries. Never give up. If something becomes comfortable, then it means that you are no longer growing. Get going, no matter what.

I take a deep breath and get real high…

This may sound cliché but it is the truth – for most people, this world is too much to handle. The complexity of our existence makes us wonder if all these are worth the fight. But I tell you, when you come to a point of uncertainty, just shrug it off. Take a deep breath and remember one thing, you are here to please no other person but yourself. Whatever things you enjoy, immerse yourself in it. Get real high and be as happy as you can be.

So what’s going on?

Keep your own pace. The destination that you want might be miles away or just around the alley, but it doesn’t matter as long as you continue moving. Remember to ask yourself, what’s going on? Re-evaluate your goals. Be more proactive in doing things. Influence others to become better people. But don’t force your spoon into their mouths. Like you, they know what’s best for them. Keep a close connection with people but never intrude in their personal space.

Pray for a revolution…

At the end of the day, pray for a revolution - a revolution of ideas, beliefs, and aspirations. Continue to seek change. And be an instrument of change. This world is in chaos, so keep reminding yourself that “All is well”! 

So, here I am. 28 years of life and still... 

Adios amigos.

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The best thing that I can do

I start my daily routine at 5:00 AM when most of the people are still sound asleep. I would walk around five and a half kilometers to reach Umapad Dumpsite. Not even a typhoon could stop me from doing this daily regimen. After all, I have seven young mouths to feed. I'd rather get wet than hear the hungry sounding stomachs of my three girls and four boys. 

All of my children are schooling. I feel that education is the only escape I can provide them against this hell that we are right now. When I was their age, I did not mind my studies. I saw no sense in scrambling numbers trying to figure out products and quotients when at the end of the day I and my brothers would still go the plantation to harvest pineapples. 

I was born in Mindanao, specifically in Manolo Fortich, Bukidnon. As glamorous as it sounds, the place is actually of no single glitter. Most people live on a one-day-one-eat scheme. Kids spent their days not in school but in large pineapple and banana plantations doing hard labor to earn a few centavos. We do not have a functioning hospital in our community. It was like, when you suffer an illness, the best that you can have is to implore the heaven that you get healed. 

I lived in Manolo Fortich, the entirety of my teenage life. I think I have harvested more than a hundred thousand pieces of pineapples that now I can't even think of smelling one. Maybe it's true that when you have too much of something, you will start to dislike it. 

When I turned 23, I decided to seek better opportunities in Cebu. I packed up my stuff, which translates to two shirts, one puldoroy, and a dog tag that my grandfather gave me. He said that it was a gift from an American friend during the second world war. It was a treasure that he wanted me to keep and give to the next generation of our kin. It's the only treasure I have with me up to now. Well, at least, I am not that poor enough not to own even a single treasure. 

The first time I arrived in Cebu, I marveled at its modern look. It was so chic to a probinsyano like me. I've never seen such a vast crowd gathered in one place. It was all good until the harsh reality of life slapped me. I tried looking for work, but everywhere I go, they'd ask me for a high school diploma. I don't have one. The truth is when I was in Mindanao, I never cared for my education. After all, why would you need to know how to divide large numbers when you are only earning a few centavos for a hard day in the plantation? 

I started sipping my coffee and ate two pieces of pandesal. The shanty which the eight of us lived was still shrouded in darkness. We do not have electricity. We couldn't afford such a luxury. My children are fast asleep except for Lando, who must go to school early as he is a working student. 

After I was done eating, I rolled two empty sacks, got my kalakay, and started heading to the dumpsite. You would barely recognize me in my scavenger costume. My entire body is generously clothed. I walked unceremoniously but filled with hope that I might hit a pot of gold in the dumpsite. I mean it. I am tired of this life. I don't care about myself anymore; I can't bear it looking at the suffering faces of my children. 

Two trucks arrived, and the witch hunt for plastic and tin cans started. There were 8 of us who would typically come early in the dumpsite. When we are not scavenging, we are the best of friends. But when we start collecting sellable trash, it's a different story. 

The minutes of sorting trash became an hour, and the hours became a day. Filled with exhaustion, I walked towards the junk shop where I would sell my sacks of plastic and metal scraps. That day, I did not hit the pot of gold I was expecting, but I was fortunate enough to have 49 pesos in my pocket. Half a kilo of rice would be 23 pesos, two packs of noodles at 16 pesos. I still have 10 pesos that I saved to give as baon of my kids for the next day. 

Just a few blocks to the slum area where I lived, I've seen many people gathering. The smoke is still rising mightily to the sky. There was a fire, and it was a humungous and devastating one. I ran as fast as I could. 

"My kids! Help me! I need to find my kids." I shouted in despair as I struggle to navigate through the crowd that has gathered. 

There was nothing left. It was like a vast football field, but only that everywhere you look was filled with ashes and debris. I started crying. I was baffled, but then a familiar voice came to my ears. 

"Pa, naa sila tanan sa Gym. Tana adto ta." It was my son Lando who, after hearing the news from his friends, rushed to aid his younger brothers and sisters. 

It was the best feeling that I have had in my life. Knowing that my kids are safe filled my heart with joy. Maybe, I did not hit the pot of gold in the dumpsite, but still, I was blessed for my family is safe. It was at that moment that I realized that it is not money that can bring us genuine happiness. It is seeing the people we love safe and sound. Material things may provide us comfort, but you can never put a price tag on true happiness. 

I am Ondo, a scavenger, a fire victim, a widower. I don't know what's left of the thinning pages of my life, but as long as I live, I will forget all these to focus on the one best thing that I could do… being a father. 

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Why I choose to be happy and why you should

There are times that I feel half-empty deep inside. There are times when I’d ask myself, what am I doing with my life. I think it is a universal thing for us to question our existence, to have doubts about ourselves, and to be filled with whys and why not.

You don’t have to be succumbed by failures to break down and say I can’t do it any longer. Even when you are at the top, you sometimes wonder if it was worth all the struggles and how are you supposed to continue. The truth is that we are born to doubt because that is the very reason why we have evolved as a species. To question our very existence is enough to tell us that we exist. And perhaps the most profound struggle of our existence is the search for happiness.

Happiness is one of the very things that all of us crave for. Sane or not, we all have the desire to feel satisfaction, to feel contentment, to be filled with joy and happiness. We all want to be happy or to think that we are happy. So why is it that some people are all but hatred, anger, and sadness? Why is it that somehow it is difficult for others to smile? Will the world become a better place if there is no suffering and it’s all just merrymaking and fun?

I’m sorry to say but I’m not here to answer those questions. The reasons I have crafted this short snippet of thoughts is because I want to tell you why I choose to be happy and why you should. Let me start with my story.

I grew in an impoverished family (And today, I’m still poor). My parents work hard just to meet the daily ends of life. We’ve been to times where we ate only once in a day. We’ve been to times where there was nothing but water to quench our thirst and relieve our hunger. We’ve been to times where we’d place buckets to catch the dripping rainwater coming from the holes in the dilapidated nipa roof of our small house. I could go all day to tell you about our poverty-stricken life but then that is again not the purpose of this piece.

It is with this impoverished background that I started to develop my old view on happiness. I’ve started to compare my life with others. I’ve set benchmarks to my happiness. I thought that in order for me to be happy I must have the luxuries of life. I thought I must be successful to be happy. I thought that I should be like this and like that to be happy. My definition of happiness has been attached to things to material stuff.

Ten years forward, I now think that for me to see happiness that way is one of the greatest blunders of my life. I realized that it was a mistake for me to equate happiness to being successful sans failures. That happiness is all about being rich with material things. That it is about merrymaking and fun.
I realized that happiness is about contentment. More importantly, it ain’t about having benchmarks but not having one. You don’t need to have a scale to be happy. What you need is the ability to appreciate what you have – to see the greatness in the things around you.

Whether we like or not, there is always someone who is in a better position than us. We could be at the apex of our career at some point but in a snap, it can go downward spiral. Uncertainty is the only thing certain in life. So to say that you can only be happy because of this or that is totally absurd. You can be happy if you choose to. You can be happy if you feel contentment. You can be happy if you remove resentment in your heart.

Don’t compare, don’t put benchmarks. Instead, learn to put value in the things around you. And more importantly, treasure the relationships you have. People may come and go in your life but the thought of having someone journeyed with you is worth a thousand smiles. And remember that the only thing stopping you from being happy is yourself.

Two things that truly define happiness: contentment and appreciation. If you learn to appreciate and if you settle the scores within yourself and stop comparing or putting benchmarks to your life, I see no reason for you not to be happy.

So here are the three reasons why I choose to be happy. (1) I choose to be happy because I can. (2) I choose to be happy because I have to. (3) I choose to be happy because if I’m not the world won’t stop and wait for me to draw a smile.

So why should you choose to be happy? Here are three reasons. (1) You should choose to be happy because you can. (2) You should choose to be happy because you have to. (3) You should choose to be happy because if you don’t the world won’t stop and wait for you to draw a smile.

Let us all fill our souls with contentment and appreciation and surely we will be happy. And again remember that happiness is not about having benchmarks but not having one.

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The sound of death

A cousin rushed to inform us that Romnick, our neighbor, is about to face the repercussion of his sins. 

We hid at home and listened to the audible footsteps of the cops who are going to “tokhang” our young neighbor. A few moments of deafening silence followed as cops walked towards their house. We did not dare to see how many cops were there as we have secured ourselves knowing that there is a possibility of fuss. From our home to Romnick’s abode, you will be passing five houses, our house, the houses of two of my aunts and another house owned by Romnick’s brother. Considering that our house has plywood walls, we know that we were also in imminent danger should the police and Romnick exchange fire. We were calm, but deep inside I know that all of the family members are worried.

It did not take that long before we heard four gunshots followed by the wailing of a woman. That woman was Romnick’s live-in partner. She begged for the life of her husband, but there was no stopping on the police operation. We thought it ended that fast, but then we heard another gunshot. In less than 5 minutes, Romnick is now reduced to a lifeless body. He is nothing but dead. 

Our hearts were beating fast, and our bodies were trembling. It was like we were inside those news reports of witnesses and their accounts of the drug-related killings of today. To others, it was just one of the EJKs to curb the rampant drug trade in our country. But to us, it was an EJK just five houses from where we live. It was an EJK that was scary enough for us to reconsider house renovation. It was an EJK that befall to a neighbor we thought was the most pious among his siblings.

Romnick’s brothers and family are famous in our place for the suspense and drama they have displayed through the years. There was one time when a brother in combat mode chased an elder brother with a bolo. There was one time when the youngest brother destroyed the Utility Pole and hit their mother causing the poor old lady to lose her left eye. There was one time when the daughter of the wife of one of Romnick’s brothers and the said brother got into a heated argument. The girl stated that she was molested by the new live-in partner of his mother while she was asleep. It was a frenzy of expletives coupled with a series of stone throwing. 

As you can see, Romnick’s family is famous enough because of their doing. When it comes to Romnick, it was actually different. We never saw him cause disturbance or menace in the neighborhood. We never saw or heard of him being in conflict with anyone in the area. He seems to be the pious one among the brothers. We thought he was the rose among the thorns. We were actually wrong. Romnick indeed was a drug pusher. In fact, one cousin of mine who has been battling drug addiction confirmed that he was able to buy drugs from Romnick. Indeed, some wolves are dressed in sheep’s skin. 

People started to gather, and the inaudible gossips of the chismosas and chismosos began to roll out. I went out of our house and looked towards the direction of Romnick’s house. There was a sizeable crowd, and one media outlet was able to send a TV reporter. Romnick’s wife was still crying. The police were already gone, and operatives have started to process the crime scene. It did not take that long before the onlookers began to dispel. A few hours later, it seems like everything has gone back to normal.

When it comes to what happened that night, all I can remember is the sound of death. Five gunshots that claimed the life of someone I know. Five shots that ushered fear among us who were there.Five shots that sealed the story of a drug pusher. Five gunshots that confirmed how staying away from drugs can extend one’s life. And five gunshots which showed to us that sometimes to rid the society of evil, extreme measures need to be executed.

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Snappy, the dog who saved my life

Once in a while, we are tested by life itself. If we triumph and succeed, we become better. But if we let the bitterness of the moment drag us down, we will be blinded by hatred… by feelings far worse than death.

“Jim, let me go with you. I wanna join your practice game.”

“Sure… we need a watery boy”

“Well, if you want someone as good as Kobe Bryant as your water boy, then I’m in.”

“Hahaha… You wish”

When people say ball is life, they usually are not that serious about it. But for our family, ball really is life. My father is a retired professional player who once represented the country in the Olympics. My mother is a courtside reporter during her younger days. Now, my father is a coach and my mother is a sports columnist. Their sons, Jim and I, are part of our respective school’s varsity team. Yes, we really love the game, but sometimes what you love can break your heart.

“Kevin, you hurry! Your brother was injured. He has been rushed to the hospital.”

These were the words of my father when he called to inform me about the demise that got my brother Jim. It has been three years since that awful afternoon. When I get to see the crutches that have become part of my brother’s daily living, I cannot stop but curse life for being too bad for him. I myself have stopped playing basketball despite my parents’ disapproval. I hate the game more than ever. I don’t want to let my brother see me inside the court because I don’t want to add more to his sufferings.

When I see my brother pretend that everything is okay, I feel so much disgust. I don’t know but I guess, more than him, it was me who blames the game for what he is right now.

“Kevin, your coach called that you can still catch up for the next season. He said that you are very much welcome to return to the team.”

“Mom, let’s not talk about this again. You know my decision…”

“Well… Just reconsider. By the way, check your room. I have a surprise there for you.”

I was excited when I heard this. I thought mom finally gave me the latest gaming console I was asking. Actually, when I stopped playing basketball, I became addicted to computer games. These games are better as there is no chance that I’ll get injured.

“Wow… a dog!” I exclaimed as I really have been asking my parents for a dog also, but they have been reluctant to give me one.

When I went to see my new pet, my excitement turned into disgust.

“What is this… why are they giving me a crippled dog? Is my brother not enough of a reminder to me of how miserable life can be?” I shouted in disgust.

At first, I did not mind about the crippled dog. The thing looks to me was a failure, a thing that is hopeless. I don’t want to offend my parents, so I just let the dog stay in my custody. The crippled dog would come close to me, trying to get my affection, but my heart and mind have been fixed. It is a useless dog. There even came timed when I would forget to feed the crippled dog for days. But then everything changed one afternoon.

I was at my desk writing a report for school when a golf ball on top of my desk fell and rolled on the floor. The crippled dog ran fast and bit the ball and bumped on my foot. I took the ball and threw it far and the crippled dog brought it back again. This was the start of my affection to the crippled dog. At that moment, I realized that the dog deserves not of condemnation or of pity. A crippled dog does not make it any lesser as a pet. The crippled dog changed me. I realized that if I dwell on the imperfections and forget about everything, it’s not the world that’s failing me, but me failing the world. We live in an imperfect world, and it is with these imperfections that we are able to appreciate more of its beauty.

Now, I and Snappy are close as ever. He is not just my dog, but also my savior. I have now returned to playing basketball and got way closer to my brother. I realized that the world does not end with every failure, with every lost opportunity. In fact, there is always a reason to be excited for tomorrow.

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Tamang Timpla ng Buhay: Pait at Tagumpay

Ang prinsipyo ng dualidad ay makikita sa lahat ng aspeto ng pisikal, metapisikal at pilosopikal na bahagi ng mga bagay at buhay sa mundo kabilang na ang tao. Nariyan ang konsepto ng mabuti at masama, umaga at gabi, langit at impyerno, liwanag at kadiliman, mainit at malamig, at marami pang iba. Likas na nahubog ang kamalayan ng tao sa pagkakaroon ng dalawang magkabila at magkasalungat na katangian o sukat. Dualismo ang tawag dito at mas nauna pa itong mahinuha ng tao kaysa sa pagkakaroon ng wika at kakayahang makipagusap.

Isa sa mga sinaunang kamalayan sa bansang Tsina ay ang Yin Yang. Ito ay isang pilosopiya na nagsasabing ang buhay ng tao ay binubuo ng dalawang aspeto, positibong elemento at negatibong elemento. Para daw maging maligaya at makabuluhan ang buhay ay dapat balanse at hindi lalamang ang isa sa dalawang elementong ito. Hindi naman daw masama ang magnasa ng purong ligaya, subalit nararapat na tanggapin natin na kailangan na minsan makatikim tayo ng pait para matuto at mas tumatag. Ayon nga sa isang makaluman turo, ang sakit na ating nararamdaman ay nagpapaalala sa atin na tayo ay buhay pa at nandito sa isang diperpektong realidad na kung tawagin ay kasalukuyan.

Sa buhay ng tao, marami ang masasabi nating pait. Kasama na rito ang mga problema, mga sakuna, mga kabiguan at higit sa lahat mga pangarap na nanatiling pangarap lamang. Tunay na masaklap ang realidad subalit hindi ito nangangahulugan na walang puwang ang ligaya sa ating buhay. Ang tagumpay ng tao, maging ito ay tagumpay sa pag-iisip, tagumpay sa pag-ibig, tagumpay ng mithiin o tagumpay na pisikal ay nariyan para balansehin ang timbangan ng buhay. Ngunit dapat alalahanin na dapat hinay-hinay lang sa pagtamasa ng saya na dala ng tagumpay. Minsan ay mapaglaro ang tadhana at kaya nitong gawing makulimlim ang umaga kahit na tirik na tirik ang araw.

Sa huli ay mahalagang isapuso natin na ang buhay na ito ay biyayang handog sa bawat isa sa atin. Linangin natin ang ating mga sarili at gawin makabuluhan ang paglalakbay sa mundo. Walang masama kung masubsob kaman sa kangkungan nang maraming beses at tunay na kasiya-siya kung naaabot mo ang alapaap ng tagumpay. Kapag nagsama na ang dalawa, mababalanse nga naman at magiging mas  kapanapanabik ang biyahe mo sa mundo. Kaya relaks lang dapat. May tamang timpla ang buhay. Ito ay may halong pait at kasamang tagumpay.  

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The Nature of Hatred and Forgiveness

Our lives have underscored the common concept of hate and forgiveness among human. As part of our nature, the essence of hating and forgiving emanates from our desires to satisfy our hearts and minds. We tend to hate because we cannot accept the illicit acts of others; we hate because we cannot take into our mind the nonsensical thoughts of the bad things other people are committing. On the contrary, we forgive because it brings serenity in our hearts; we forgive because it puts our minds at ease. As you can see, we are created to experience both. But which is more powerful between hatred and Forgiveness? I’m here to give a pragmatic discussion on the opposing powers of the two most powerful facets of human nature.

From the beginning of time, I was trained to become a forgiving child. I was always thought that forgiveness consoles the soul and quenches one’s mind… Indeed, forgiving is truly enjoyable. I learned to forgive and forget the easy way. But as years went by, there was a shift in my ideals. I asked myself what’s the real essence of forgiving? What if by forgiving, I am only spoiling the person to do same act again and again? What if I am making the person worse because I’m telling him that it’s okay and nothing's wrong? My point is that forgiveness sometimes has it flaws. Forgiveness is good, but we must always tell those who committed the sin that it was indeed wrong and that he deserves to reflect on his behavior. Forgive and forget but do not forget to tell the person that he must feel sorry and that he needs to change for the better. Forgiving is natural to us. Just like God, as we are created in His likeness, we do have the ability to give other people their much deserved second chance. This sounds easy right? The sad thing is that forgiving is as difficult as climbing the Everest. It is possible, but you must have the courage and the will to do so. And it is with this reason that we tend to lean on the easier but more stressful thing which is hatred.

Hatred is one of the most puzzling emotions. It’s like a flame scattering like wildfire in one’s system. The moment you start to hate, you are throwing yourself to the pit of bitterness and anger. This bottomless pit will swallow your system and transform you to a man of absurd negativities. Nevertheless, hatred is sometimes good. We must hate as it is part of our human nature, but we must hate the right things. We must hate sin, we must hate the devil and we must hate those acts which disobey the will of God. While we must hate sin, we should remember to forgive the sinners. As what an old adage says, “Condemn the sin not the sinner.” I’d love to elaborate on this part, but it is unnecessary as the focal thing regarding our need to forgive is settled in one scope - If God was able to forgive, why can’t we? We must embrace those who committed wrong and we must treat them as patients who need to regain the spirit of valuing and loving the will of God. Let us all learn to forget and forgive. Moreover, let us keep our hearts and mind in serenity by not allowing hatred to reside within us. Be free and feel free. Again, forgive and forget!

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Life is a Big Ha!

Disgust across thy broadest heavens
‘Tis never ending flow of heavy fears
Anger within thy hearts has broaden
A resonance of madness and tears

Ha! Life is surely a maze of mess
A dazzling wagon in a lonely street
There are those who quench with success
Others bathe in the bitterness of defeats

What’s the use of fighting for survival?
When in the end, all must rest in peace.
We are just part of the world’s disposal.
Bear no more, in rest we’re at ease.

Life is Big Ha! Eternally filled with disgust
With lust and the trivial things unmasked
Life is Big Ha! It’s a never-ending holocaust
One is bounded to move along this track

But live not in fear of the mundane end
Oust yourself from thy comfort zone
Stand, get stumbled and learn to bend
Take its dooms, enjoy each storm.

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The Amazing Restaurant Called Life

You can visit it once, but you can never be back!

There was this restaurant named Life. With their glittering plates, sparkling glasses and exquisite service to offer, a lot of people have gone through this small restaurant. Everybody come to this establishment not knowing what will be served to them. And much to the dismay of most costumers, only a few were offered with a good menu. One time a customer visiting this bistro was served with a dish of wealth, a glass of fame and a big bowl of luxury while at the same time someone on the table was a client that isn’t happy to what was served to him. Who would be if the main course is a dish of problems placed in a rusty plate, a small plastic cup with misfortune for the drink, and a salad of thorns for the dessert?

A lot of stories were written about this restaurant, events inside are happening in ways you can’t ever imagine. One time a person was served with victory as an appetizer but the main course was failures. This man was not able to finish his entire meal. He took one of the knives and stabbed his own chest while eating the main course. Funny things are happening in here too. Once, a young lady that was so ambitious was served with the opportunity of eating gold beside this dirty old man if she agrees to marry this man whom she have known just for a day. What was funny was that on the day of their marriage the old man died and the young lady was left with a big chunk of gold. Having eaten too much and thinking that she still have a lot. She kept on sharing this to opportunistic people together with her on the same table. But before she realizes it, she was left with nothing but a small bite of dust. Having no food to eat, she died poor and hungry.

The fact is that every costumer in this restaurant is served with a unique menu. Some are budget meals, others are so expensive, a few are priceless and most are cheap. But everyone is given the chance to change the food they are eating. That is if they are ready to work for it and to fight for it that was served to another costumer. Some consumer even share their food and are generously giving to people who are less privilege and are eating the cheap ones. Another interesting fact, these menus are flexible also. You may be served with a bottle of Joy or another bottle but of sadness the choice is yours. Then again, what is mostly unacceptable is the fact that others are given the good menu without striving for them while some needs to struggle just to eat better food.

As you can see, this restaurant can offer everybody an assortment. The gourmet may be delightful and appealing or it may be the worst and full of bitterness. But it is up to you, if you are willing to eat bad food for the rest of your meal. We can’t avoid the fact that some are given better food while others are given awful menus. Remember one thing, what ever is given to you, be thankful to the chef.

By the way, this article was written by someone who is still eating inside this bistro and everything he has told you is completely true. He was even served not the best menu, just a fine one. Nevertheless, he is satisfied and pleased.

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